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Andrea Anderson Polk’s Blog

Clinically Practiced, Biblically Informed

  • Writer's pictureAndrea Anderson Polk

The Need-To-Know-Syndrome

Updated: Sep 12, 2023

Do you need to know, right NOW?

I call this the Need-To-Know-Syndrome. When a solution to a problem is not obvious or knowing the answer is not immediate, we become impatient and anxious. This causes us to make poor decisions or creates unnecessary worry and stress.

An obsessive need to know is a form of control. Control is rooted in fear. We fear the unknown, we fear pain, and we fear rejection. Fear can look like being overly controlling in relationships with others, at work, or in our daily life and thinking patterns.

We want to control during moments of uncertainty when we are feeling unsafe, vulnerable, anxious, and insecure. We control through toxic overthinking by ruminating, rationalizing, and reasoning.

The Tree of Knowledge: Can You Relate to Eve?

The need to know is an age-old problem. In the book of Genesis, we read that God instructed Adam and Eve not to eat from the Tree of Knowledge. Eve’s conversation with the serpent led her to begin to contemplate “you will be like God, knowing good and evil” (Gen. 3:5).

Eve began to doubt God’s goodness and believed the lie that God was withholding something good from her (knowledge). Eve then saw that the tree was able to make her wise. Our knowledge in and of itself, apart from God, does not produce life (The Tree of Life). Adam and Eve made knowledge their god from that day forward, and they became self-conscious and ashamed.

The enemy’s tactics to tempt us and engage us in conversations that are based in a lie are still present today, just as our desire for knowledge apart from our Creator is still a temptation. When we try to become like God in our knowledge, we open ourselves up for God’s Word to be twisted, and we believe lies instead of the truth.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths. Do not be wise in your own eyes (Prov. 3:5-7).

Many times we trust God only when we understand what he is doing, but whatever God is doing, it does not need to make sense to us for it to make sense to God. We do not need to understand why God does or does not do certain things.

We say, “I don’t understand why this happening, God.” Whatever is happening does not need our understanding. It exists whether we understand it or not.

Understanding is not a requirement for faith. Jesus says, “You don’t understand yet the meaning of what I’m doing, but soon it will be clear to you.” (John 13:7). If we understood everything perfectly, we would not need to rely on God. We would rely on ourselves and our knowledge.

The truth is…

No matter how ready you are – parts of your story, your healing, and your answer will remain hidden until it’s time for you to know them.

“Things are hidden temporarily only as a means to revelation” (Mark 4:22).

I continue to learn and apply these principles in my life and decided to share them in order to help you find a peace that passes understanding in moments of uncertainty.

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Andrea Anderson Polk is a licensed professional counselor, nationally certified, registered clinical supervisor, and certified professional coach. She has a private practice in Northern Virginia with nearly 20 years of clinical experience helping hundreds of clients on their healing journey.

She is driven by a deep calling to help ambitious women of faith experience healing and breakthrough so they can live each day with peace and purpose. 

Andrea believes healing happens through relationship. The wounds that occur in a relationship must be healed in a relationship. Andrea invites you into a life-altering relationship.

Work with Andrea one-one- by contacting her here.


Andrea has spent her career studying the human experience and has developed a fascinating analogy that compares cuckoo birds, nature’s master manipulator and imposter, to situations and relationships that leave us feeling drained, confused, lost, and empty. Her new book, The Cuckoo Syndrome, helps us fend off the cuckoos, the unhealthy relationships, toxic thinking, and self-sabotaging behaviors in our life that never truly satisfy the deep longings of our souls and the desires of our hearts. 

Andrea’s clinically proven, innovative method helps us recover the lost pieces of ourselves, discover meaning in suffering, and transform our pain into purpose by teaching us to uncover the truth of who we are and who God is so we can be healed and live free. 

Purchase the book Andrea’s clients call “a life-changing breakthrough” for yourself and the people you care about today.

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If you….

Feel internal pressure to do all things well. 

Tend to neglect your needs to please others and search for validation.

Continually attract toxic or one-sided relationships leaving you drained. 

Want to build a life that is unashamedly true to who you are and what you want.


Then…this is the time to reclaim your JOY, ENERGY, AND TIME so you can live each day with peace and purpose!


Curious to know how?

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