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A.
Clinically Practiced, Biblically Informed
Most Recent Blog Post
Taking Thoughts Captive: Why Your Mind Still Spirals with Anxiety
Just because you think it… doesn’t mean it’s true. Albert Einstein said it best: “The world we have created is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.” Taking Thoughts Captive Spiritually speaking, Scripture reminds us in 2 Corinthians 10:5 that we are invited to “take every thought captive.” In the original Greek, “taking every thought captive” uses a word for capturing prisoners of war, painting a picture of active restraint — not pass
Jan 315 min read
Taking Thoughts Captive: Why Your Mind Still Spirals with Anxiety
Just because you think it… doesn’t mean it’s true. Albert Einstein said it best: “The world we have created is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.” Taking Thoughts Captive Spiritually speaking, Scripture reminds us in 2 Corinthians 10:5 that we are invited to “take every thought captive.” In the original Greek, “taking every thought captive” uses a word for capturing prisoners of war, painting a picture of active restraint — not pass
Jan 315 min read
My Greatest Ambition
Leading a Quiet Life in a Noisy World As you know, I often write about redefining success. I came across this striking quote earlier this week and wanted to share it with you. It beautifully captures my life mantra: “We urge you, brothers and sisters… to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life.” (1 Thessalonians 4:11) My definition of success has narrowed down to a quiet life—not a famous life, not a be-the-best life, not a stressed life. By quiet, I mean intentional, insp
Sep 21, 20255 min read
The Dream I Forgot I Prayed For
As a therapist—and a human being—who’s a recovering (and sometimes relapsing) control-freak-perfectionist, many of my writings keep returning to the themes of ambition and redefining success. A Truth I Keep Circling Back To Lately, I keep circling around a certain truth, and I want to share it—I hope it will encourage you, too: You can have big dreams for the future and still be completely content in the present. And they can flip-flop, because life is unpredictable, messy, a
Sep 19, 20254 min read
10 Signs You're Overthinking (and What to Do About it)
Ever feel like your brain just won’t quit? You’re lying in bed, caught in an endless loop — planning for things that might never happen,...
Aug 22, 20254 min read
A Hidden Anxiety
The quiet anxiety no one talks about, but many carry We all get anxious—it’s part of being human. But how we respond to it and what we make it mean about ourselves, matters just as much. Many of my clients get stuck in the mindset that they’re supposed to fix their anxiety. When that doesn’t happen, they assume a deep fault lies within. That assumption—that there's an inherent flaw—is often the hidden anxiety. Existential Anxiety: What It Is and Why It Feels Hidden Existentia
Jul 1, 20258 min read
What I Learned From a Robin About Calming Anxiety
We don’t always need a breakthrough to find peace. Sometimes, all it takes is a quiet moment outside. In this reflection, I share a simple experience that reminded me of something deeper about anxiety, trust, and the reassuring wisdom found in the biblical passage of Matthew chapter 6. Whether or not you consider yourself religious, I believe there's something universally comforting in the reminder that we don’t have to carry everything on our own. A Run, a Robin, and a Remin
May 5, 20254 min read
Do You Need More Alone Time? 10 Signs You Do
From a Therapist Who Gets It I have to be alone often. I need a lot of personal space. I say no—a lot. And I’m socially selective— not out of avoidance, and not because I don’t enjoy connection. I do it because I care about my peace, my nervous system, and how I show up in the world. It took me years to stop feeling guilty about it and start accepting it as essential. If you're an ambitious, deep-thinking woman who finds herself craving space—even from people you love—this p
Apr 17, 202510 min read
Who or What is Your Source of Success?
The greatest indicator that I have given my power away to someone or something outside of myself is reaching a point where I have no joy left inside me. Then I lose my confidence. Then I lose my inner peace. Then I lose my passion. Then I lose myself. As I mentioned in my previous blog post, a few years ago, that season of loss led me into an identity crisis, therapy, and saying goodbyes. I became discontent and disconnected from myself. I was stuck. As I looked at my brand a
Mar 8, 20256 min read
Redefining Success: And the Cost of Perfection
I recently watched the Netflix documentary, “Martha,” and found it inspiring and validating because of the life lessons I’ve learned over the last few years. Specifically, redefining what success looks like for me. One of the major changes I made was to only write and create when I feel inspired from my personal life. I never put stuff out there just to put it out there. I must live it and feel it so you can feel it too. I want my writing to be personal and relatable. I want
Feb 1, 202515 min read
From Embarrassment to Self-Acceptance
Take some time to think about who you are and what you really want for yourself without feeling embarrassed.
Jun 15, 20246 min read
When Jesus Had a Firm Boundary (You Can Too)
Sometimes when I’m feeling overwhelmed with the demands of the day or I need a word of encouragement, I pull out my Bible and randomly...
Jun 15, 20245 min read
My Hidden Season
Helping you embrace seasons of quiet, rest, and reflection when you're an ambitious woman who wants to write and create.
May 5, 20247 min read
25 Helpful Boundaries for the Holidays (and All Year Round)
Are you dealing with the stress of navigating difficult friends and family members this holiday season? You are not alone. All year round I talk with clients about setting boundaries in their relationships. Typically, they request examples of specific language to use to communicate their wants, needs, and limits to others. The holidays are often a time when boundaries are necessary, but difficult to establish due to various expectations, traditions, or behaviors of others. He
Dec 9, 20238 min read
How Anger Helped Julie Overcome Anxiety
This is the final post in the series on anger. Read the first three posts here: When Anger is a Gift , Ways You Avoid Anger and Why , How to Deal with Anger and Set Boundaries. Today I'm sharing Julie's story which reveals a powerful truth you can apply to your own life to help with anxiety. Julie* sat on my sofa anxious and confused. She expressed how she was introduced through a mutual friend at her church to a lovely man named Liam, whom she began dating. She shared how
Jul 23, 20236 min read
How to Deal with Anger and Set Boundaries
Learn practical ways to from an experienced therapist on how set boundaries and stick with it! Including how to practice self-care.
Jul 9, 202316 min read
Ways You Avoid Anger and Why
Did you know anger is a gift and serves to protect you? In the last post, we looked at Kate’s story and how avoiding anger can cause you to lose yourself and become vulnerable to unhealthy relational patterns and lack the boundaries needed for self-care. You might not realize that your avoided anger is the hidden culprit behind your current struggles. Avoiding anger does not make it go away. You can ignore it, medicate it, or pretend it does not exist for days, even years a
Jun 13, 202315 min read
When Anger is a Gift
Did you know that anger is a gift and serves to protect you? Kate has been consumed by her work as the CEO of an organization she is very passionate about. In addition to feeling scattered and stressed, she feels disconnected from God and from people. Although Kate feels blessed by her career, great husband, and church community - she is confused by her underlying feelings of sadness, loneliness, and unexpected moments of emptiness. People look to her as a leader and she feel
May 16, 20238 min read
My Gratitude Journal Changed My Life
When I first started my gratitude journal, I felt silly because what made me grateful seemed insignificant, frivolous, and maybe even weird.
Apr 11, 20239 min read
Overcoming Your Fantasy Friend
When you feel hurt, lonely, rejected, abandoned, ashamed, anxious, jealous, inadequate, or like an imposter, your Fantasy Friend makes you
Mar 27, 20237 min read
Rachel and Her Fantasy Friend
We all have a Fantasy Friend we turn to that keeps us feeling safe, needed, loved, special, and important. Your "Fantasy Friend" can look...
Mar 13, 20235 min read
Who's Your Fantasy Friend?
We’ve all been hurt and we’ve all experienced painful situations and relationships such as heartbreak, the loss of a dream or a loved...
Feb 21, 20237 min read
The Paradox of Grief, Part two.
In the previous blog post, we explored grief after the passing of my grandmother, Ga-Ga, who died suddenly during my teenage years. Her passing left a profound impact, and for years, the grief went unexpressed, quietly eroding joy. Unresolved grief can leave a lasting impact, quietly diminishing our joy and affecting our sense of self. A Divine Connection to Joy Scripture reveals a profound connection between joy and sadness. Those who sow in tears shall reap in joy. (Ps. 1
Feb 6, 20234 min read
The Paradox of Grief, Part one.
We all experience loss. Loss of a loved one. Loss of a career. Loss of a dream. Loss of a relationship. Loss of a marriage. Loss of ourselves. Grief is a deep sadness — a natural emotional response to loss. When we avoid grief, it adds suffering to an already painful loss and slowly steals our joy. With my clients — and in my own life — I’ve found that grief is often the most painful emotion, and therefore the most feared and avoided. And that makes sense. Grandmother’s Pre
Jan 30, 20236 min read
Struggling With the Winter Blues or Feeling Down and Dreary?
The holiday season has come to a close and the Christmas decorations are put away. The house seems bare which has a somberness that pleases me. There is beauty in barren winter with its return to a simpler existence, relief in the absence of clutter, and a tranquility and quiet order that convenes on this brisk January day. This satisfies my soul. Most people dread the winter and I embrace it. I find it an excuse to be indoors with a hot cup of tea, relaxing by the fire, with
Jan 16, 20237 min read
Christine's Story of Setting Boundaries with a Difficult Family Member
Christine came for counseling due to anxiety and feeling stuck because of a challenging relationship with her younger sister, Sarah. She had two sisters and was very close with her other sister, Mary, whom she considered a best friend. After spending time with Sarah, she would feel drained and emotionally exhausted, but she could not put her finger on why. Our sessions helped her understand that her anxiety was a symptom that was masking her real emotion of anger toward Sarah
Dec 4, 20225 min read
7 Warning Signs of Your Partner’s Harmful Behavior in Therapy
In the previous post, I identified 13 warning signs of harmful therapy designed to help you know when a therapist is displaying harmful behavior in your counseling sessions. Today we will look at how to recognize when your partner’s behavior in therapy is harmful. The last thing you want is to feel just as disillusioned and confused in therapy as you did before therapy. Perhaps your intuition is telling you something is not right about the counseling process and how your par
Nov 14, 20223 min read
What is the Purpose of Therapy and Do You Need It?
The previous post, identified 13 warning signs of harmful therapy designed to help you know when a therapist is displaying harmful behavior in your counseling sessions. I also discussed what makes a therapist a good therapist and how to define a healthy counseling relationship. In today’s post, we will dive deeper into the purpose of therapy and help you determine if it's time for you to begin therapy. Decades ago, the reason I pursued my purpose as a therapist is because o
Nov 7, 20224 min read
What Makes a Therapist a Good Therapist?
In the previous post, we identified 13 warning signs of harmful therapy designed to help you know when a therapist is displaying unhealthy behavior in your counseling sessions. In today’s post, we will discuss what makes a therapist a good therapist and how to define a healthily counseling relationship. Many of my clients seek counseling after having been in therapy for years and suffering without experiencing significant symptom relief and without lasting healing after m
Oct 10, 20224 min read
13 Warning Signs Therapy Harms Not Helps
As a licensed therapist, with over twenty years of clinical experience counseling people, it saddens my heart to state the reality that professional therapists provide harmful counsel. By that I mean, rather than helping people, they are hurting people. Below is a list of thirteen warning signs of harmful therapy that will help you identify when your therapist is displaying unprofessional, unhealthy behavior in your counseling sessions: #1: They accuse you of things that are
Oct 3, 20223 min read
Should I Stay or Leave the Relationship? Part two.
In the previous post, we began to address the question: Should I stay or leave the relationship? The answer is neither straightforward nor black and white. It is complex and nuanced. Many of my clients do not know what to do, and they become trapped in the land of indecision. My goal is to help you make the decision to stay or leave from a place of clarity, not from a place of being stuck. Overthinking the question of staying or leaving the relationship keeps you stuck and
Sep 26, 20225 min read
Should I Stay or Leave the Relationship? Part one.
You might be wondering, Should I stay or leave the relationship? The answer is neither straightforward nor black and white. It is complex and nuanced. Many of my clients do not know what to do, and they become trapped in the land of indecision. My goal is to help you make the decision to stay or leave from a place of clarity, not from a place of being stuck. I’ve created an initial 3-step process addressing the multi-layered healing that takes place when people are willing t
Sep 10, 20225 min read
My Migraine Miracle
Thus far in this series about projectizing , a deeper form of perfectionism, showing up in a tendency to anxiously fix ourselves, we discussed how important it is to refrain from making ourselves a project to be fixed or a problem to solve - rather than a person worthy of love and compassion. We also explored Sarah’s story of shame around her singleness and confusion about her faith. As well as helpful ways to overcome chronic overthinking and how to break free from obses
Aug 29, 20227 min read
Do You Want to Be Fixed or Be Free?
Thus far in this series about projectizin g , a deeper form of perfectionism, showing up in a tendency to anxiously fix ourselves, we discussed how important it is to refrain from making ourselves a project to be fixed or a problem to solve, rather than a person worthy of love and compassion. We also explored Sarah’s story , a woman desiring marriage and how she makes herself a project, as we dive deep into her story of shame around her singleness and confusion around her f
Aug 10, 20225 min read
Anxious Overthinking
Thus far in this series about projectizing , a deeper form of perfectionism, showing up in a tendency to anxiously fix ourselves , we discussed how important it is to refrain from making ourselves a project to be fixed or a problem to solve, rather than a person worthy of love and compassion. We also explored Sarah’s story , a woman desiring marriage and how she makes herself a project, as we dive deep into her story of shame around her singleness and confusion around her
Aug 4, 20224 min read
A Single Woman’s Story of Shame
Last week we discussed a common defense mechanism, projectizing, a deeper form of perfectionism, by making ourselves a project to be fixed or a problem to be solved rather than treating ourselves as a person worthy of love and compassion. In today’s post, I will be sharing an example of how the defense of projectizing shows up in our life through Sarah’s story, a single woman desiring marriage who is struggling with shame around her singleness and suffering with confusion ar
Jul 9, 20226 min read
Trying to Fix Yourself (and Staying Stuck)
Fix Me! Fix Me! Many of my clients seek counseling after having been in therapy for years and suffering without any significant symptom relief and without lasting healing after multiple therapists have failed. After a few sessions with me, they say, “I’ve felt a freedom here that I never experienced in three years or even three months with my other therapists after just three sessions with you! How do you do that?” My response is simple: “I’m not trying to fix you.” As humans
Jul 5, 20225 min read
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